Hey Yall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, have you missed me??  I hope so!!!!  lol Anyways, so much is going on right now.......I HAVE to write somewhere before I go even more insane then I already am!!!!!!

First off, I did my nails today!!!!  I am sooooooo ready for Spring!

Aren't they adorable????  I am just thankful I was actually able to take a min and get them done......I am not sure how I am feeling about these jamberrys yet.  I have a blog coming soon about that!! (promise)

Anyhow, now to write......

OK, as many of my readers know about me as of now is that I am Bipolar.  Yea, It sucks and yes, I am 37 years old and still learning how to cope with it and it is hard.  Always a battle. And I always hate it when it affects my relationships!!! especially with my daughter!!!! (or any of my family)

When your bipolar, a schedule is a MUST!!! At least for me it is????  I need some bipolar friends to talk to sometimes.....smh!  Anyhow, my daughter and my grandson moved in with my bf, son and myself back in November.  Am I thankful.....YES, is it hard on me??? HECK YES!!!  Anyhow, November to Feb I have been adjusting to having her here and also adjusting to a toddler running around and always into something.  I have had to adjust to more laundry, but that's OK too. I am thankful we have clothes too wash.....lol  I have had to adjust to toys everywhere, but that's OK because at least he has toys.  Y'all get what I am saying, right??  I mean, Yes......all of it is an adjustment and yes it is harder on me, but I manage to get through it.

*disclaimer* y'all, I started this blog a couple of weeks ago!!!! And I am just now back on the draft!!  Another downfall to being bipolar.  I don't have the attention span I need to finish things!!!!

Anyhow, as I was saying, things are just 100x's worse on me then it is on someone without being bipolar!!!  And the hardest thing to do is to explain to someone who is aka "normal".  norms just don't get it!!!!  I have found that writing to y'all does help, I just have to finish what I start!!!

Guess what......so they changed my daughters schedule!! Found this out this week.  Her new schedule consist of me keeping my grandson from about 2 pm until 10 am the following morning!!!  So, more adjusting!!! BUT!!  My daughter and I are doing better, I just hate when I get moody and she don't understand and she gets attitude back and all......just causes more stress but, I am trying to be patient and continue to pray and get through all this!!!!  I am thankful that my daughter was blessed with this job since she is mom & dad for my grandson and I promise I am gonna continue to help her achieve her dreams......even if it is hell on me!!  Isn't that what moms do???  I mean, my mom wasn't there for me, other things had her attention(RIP).  I always said that is something I will always be for my kids.....there for them!!!!  That's only what is right!!! right???

Thanks for letting me vent!!!! I know it is all over the place(thanks to being manic) but it does help me cope and get through things!!!!

I hope all of you are doing good and as always #stayblessed

MUAHS!

Nightmares!!!!

So, I haven't been sleeping well lately.  My schedule is all outta whack with my daughter's job and all!!  I am up at 5 am every morning,  Going, as soon as my feet hit the floor!!  Now, I don't mind this at all, really!!  I am NOT a lazy person at all.  But, once I get sleep deprived........its over for me!!  Anyhow, like I was saying, up at 5 am and not in bed until about 1:30 am every night!!  that's only about 3 1/2 hrs sleep every night!!  That isn't good for me......at all!!!  And now I know it!!!

I wasn't able to go to sleep until about 2 am this morning and I had a nightmare and I was woken up about 3 am!!  Y'all, I was TERRIFIED!  I swear I was dead!!!  By the time I was able to calm myself down and was feeling tired it was 4 am, really!!??  What kind of fool would I be to go to sleep when my alarm was about to go off???  All it would do is pi** me off!!  So, I couldn't cut the TV on,  I didn't wanna wake anyone.  I finally ended up getting my phone and laptop and going into the living room.

Today is gonna be hard! I got a whole hours of sleep and I gotta drive my bf to work in about 15 mins.....then I gotta come home and wake the kid up for school.  Once he is gone my daughter will get up and get ready for work and I will have my grandson until about 11 tonight.  I am more then likely gonna be on edge and pretty cranky.  I don't like these types of days because not only is it hell for me, but for anyone that comes around me today!!

So, I guess I'll do my morning prayers and just pray that Heavenly Father gives me the strength and patience I need to get through this day!!!!!!!!!!

On another note....... HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!!!

Don't forget to wear GREEN so u don't get pinched!!!! And as always, #StayBlessed

MUAHS!

#SundayFunday

Yes!!!!  I know I haven't been blogging like I should.  Like I said in an earlier post, I have so much going on and my bipolar has really been controlling me more then me controlling it!!! So, today was a day that I really needed.

Since my daughter started working, she had planned this day for us.  She got my dad to go pick up my oldest son and they drove an hr and a half to come up here for the day.  She treated us to Chinese take-out and we went to the park to eat.

We couldn't have asked for a prettier day!!!!  After the last 2 rainy days......the sun finally came out and it was pleasantly warm!!!!

Hello Spring!

Well Hello Spring!!!! That is exactly how it was today!! It was perfect!! And it really was a day I needed!!  My family and fun!!!

I <3 my daddy

YUM

He wanted to play

Karsyn and Unc

never too old to play

he has me wrapped

weeeee

such a cutie

I don't even know lol

couldn't ask for a prettier day!

<3

All Smiles!

Karsyn and Unc #Priceless

My baby boy

Vitamin D

YYAAAASSSSSS!

Me and my oldest son

Sometimes not worrying about anything and just playing is a good release!!!!  I am so thankful and blessed to be so close with my family!!!

What did y'all get to do for #SundayFunday??  Hope y'all had beautiful weather today too!!!

Also, I got my #beautybox5 and I will have my #SubscriptionBoxSaturday up tomorrow!!!!

Until tomorrow!!!  #StayBlessed

Muahs!

overwhelmed

Hey you guys!!  I am so sorry I haven't posted in a min, but......with all of my mental issues I have been really overwhelmed.  Like, Its not a bad reason I am overwhelmed, just a major change in my family's schedule.

My daughter found her a job! Yay!! She moved back in with us back around Thanksgiving, which has been an adjustment for me in itself.  I am not used to having a toddler running around!  lol  and now that my daughter is working, I have him from 2-10....so, I haven't had time to write!!  And it sucks cause I have so many cute pictures to share and a few other things!!  I usually do it before bed....which, lately......I'm lucky I get covered up before I am out!!

Starting tomorrow, I am gonna squeeze a blog in the morning!!  I am "lucky" enough to get about 2 hrs in the morning to myself.  I have from 5-6:15 completely alone!!  I always try and use this time to do scripture study and prayer. I ALWAYS pray!!!! BUT, I have been trying to become more consistent with my scripture study!!  I then have 6:15-7:20 with my son up getting ready for school, so, I am gonna start squeezing my writing time in there!!

I just hope you guys stay patient with me while I try and adjust to all this new stuff going on!!  I know with my bipolar, a schedule is sooo important!!  I have noticed over the years that when I am not on a schedule I tend to get totally overwhelmed which usually triggers insomnia(worse then I already have) and a manic state for me!!  I will have a new schedule hopefully within the next week or so. So, if you pray, please remember me as I try and adjust to all of this new stuff!!

COMING SOON!!!!

my grandson is growing up

modeling his new clothes 

early morning cuddles

party over hhheeerrrrreeeeeee

dressing himself

isn't he the cutest??!!

Muahs & Stay Blessed